Why Retirement Planning Looks Different for Solo Agers (and What to Do About It)

I’ll be honest: I never really imagined growing old alone. I think, like a lot of women, I assumed life would eventually include a partner, a built-in teammate, someone to do the “later years” with. But at the current rate of annual dates (which is a solid 0/0, for those keeping score at home), I’ve started thinking more intentionally about what aging might look like for me.

Right now, I’m incredibly grateful to live close to my parents and spend meaningful time with them. But I also know that, eventually, I’ll be on my own. And that’s led me to ask some honest questions: Have I built a strong enough support system? Will I need to lean on my brother or sister someday—not financially, but when health gets complicated? Or do I need to make sure I’ve saved enough to confidently check myself into one of those swanky aging communities where you gracefully migrate from independent living to assisted living to skilled nursing to hospice?

(And yes… just typing that made a little emotional storm cloud float over my head. Yuck.)

Who actually wants to think about this stuff?

Probably not most of us. And, honestly, not me either.

But this is exactly why I do what I do.

Because this is what I’ve trained for. This is what I’ve built my career around. Helping independent women think ahead—without fear, without overwhelm, and without pretending “future me” will magically figure it out later.

So the real question becomes:

How do we financially—and emotionally—set ourselves up for success as solo agers?

Let’s talk about it.

More people than ever are aging without a partner or close family support — whether never-married, divorced, widowed, or geographically distant from relatives. This group — often called solo agers — faces unique financial, legal, and emotional challenges that traditional planning doesn’t fully address.

Here are some key areas of retirement planning to rethink so we can age confidently, independently, and with support when we need it most.

Rethink Our Financial Foundation

In typical retirement planning, we hear things like “aim for 6 months of emergency savings” or “invest for long-term growth and don’t worry about income until retirement.” But solo agers need to think differently:

Build a Bigger Emergency Fund

Solo agers are often on their own when life throws a curveball — and those curveballs can be expensive. Experts suggest aiming for 12–18 months of accessible savings so you’re covered if a health issue, job disruption, or unexpected bill shows up.

I agree with this advice, with the caveat that we need to broaden how we think about emergency funds. Typically, emergency funds sit in high-yield savings accounts.  We need to diversify how we hold this cash (think laddered bonds, or money markets) so we're still earning as much interest on our money as we can.

Think About Where We Live

That big, multi-story dream house? It might be charming — until stairs become a safety issue. We need to consider how future-proof our living situation is. Single-level homes, planned communities, or intentional living arrangements (like co-housing) can keep us safer and more socially connected without sacrificing independence.

Account for Paid Help

Meals, rides, cleaning, home health aides, and other services add up fast — especially if we don’t have family to fill those roles. It’s smart to build these costs into our long-term budget rather than hope they won’t be needed.

Build Our “Family” (Even If We’re Solo)

It's taken me years to understand that independence does not mean isolation. One of the strongest predictors of quality of life as we age is the strength of our social network — and that network doesn’t have to be biological. We need to:

• Cultivate reciprocal friendships — people we see regularly, trust, and can count on (and who can count on us).

• Join community groups, classes, volunteer networks, or interest groups to meet people who can step in when needed.

• Explore intentional communities or shared living arrangements that bring both structure and social support.

Our “family of choice” can be one of our greatest assets.

Get the Legal & Decision-Making Pieces in Place

One of the biggest gaps for solo agers is clarity around who makes decisions when we can’t. We can’t just assume someone will know what we want — we have to document it.

At a minimum, we need to have:

✔ A durable financial power of attorney

✔ A healthcare power of attorney / advance directive

✔ A living will

✔ A will or trust that reflects your wishes

If we don’t have close contacts we trust to step into these roles — professional fiduciaries and aging life care managers exist for exactly this purpose. They can be our advocate, decision-maker, and coordinator when needed.

Use Technology to Bridge the Gaps

We live in a golden age of tech that can help solo agers stay safe and connected:

• Medical alert systems and smart home sensors

• Telehealth and remote monitoring

• Ride services for appointments and errands

• Apps that organize essential information (contacts, meds, docs)

These tools don’t replace human connection, but they dramatically enhance safety and independence. While they can be cumbersome to learn, I've never found a young person who doesn't love immediately jumping in and explaining (or setting the app up themselves) on my phone.

Build a Trusted Support Team

No one succeeds alone — especially as we age. A holistic plan includes a network of professionals who can help when life gets complicated:

• Financial planners and investment pros

• Elder law attorneys

• Certified aging life care managers

• Daily money managers

• Healthcare advocates

If the person advising us hasn’t asked about our support system, retirement housing preferences, or decision-making plans, that’s a red flag — and not a sufficient enough planning conversation.

Aging Solo Doesn’t Mean Doing It Alone

Here’s the best part: with the right plan in place, aging without a partner can be vibrant, connected, and deeply fulfilling. Many solo agers report high levels of personal satisfaction and autonomy — especially those who plan proactively and intentionally.

You don’t have to hope someone will step in when you need help — you can design a plan that gives you confidence, security, and a meaningful life as you age.

When I joked earlier about my dating record and those “swanky aging communities,” I wasn’t being dramatic. I was being honest. These are real thoughts many independent women have — even if we don’t say them out loud.

I don’t have every answer about what my own later years will look like. None of us do. But I do know this: peace of mind doesn’t come from avoiding these conversations. It comes from preparing for them.

And that’s what this work is really about.

It’s about making sure that whether you grow older with a partner, a chosen family, or on your own, you are supported, secure, and confident in the life you’ve built.

You don’t have to figure this out alone.

And you don’t have to wait until it feels urgent.

Future you is already grateful you’re reading this today.

And if you’d like help building a plan that fits your life, I’d love to be in your corner.